Seven ways to boost your self-compassion skills

"We cannot ignore our pain and have compassion for it at the same time" - Brené Brown

Showing compassion for yourself is the ability to slow down, and offer yourself a small prayer of encouragement.

Self-compassion can help you cope with the urges in a nonjudgmental way. It feels like a warm, friendly hand on your shoulder. Through the compassion your tension leaves your body, and the oversensitive mind calms down.

Strong self-compassion can even set the stage for better health, relationships, and general well-being. So far, research has revealed a number of benefits of self-compassion. Lower levels of anxiety and depression have been observed in people with higher self-compassion. Some people come by self-compassion naturally, but not everyone does. Luckily, it is a learnable skill.

Here are seven ways to give your self-compassion skills a quick boost:

• Practice gratitude. Reflecting on the things in your life that you appreciate will foster a sense of compassion for those less fortunate.

• Comfort your body. Eat something healthy. Lie down and rest. Massage your own neck, feet, or hands. Take a walk. Anything you can do to improve how you feel physically gives you a dose of self-compassion.

• Be kind to yourself. Sometimes we are our own worst enemies. Remember that all human beings are flawed and will make mistakes; ongoing rumination and self-loathing serves no benefit to you or anyone around you. Instead, practice self-forgiveness and coping tools that will help you to move forward in a more positive way.

• Avoid judgment. It is impossible to know the factors that have led a person toward their current predicament; nor how we would fare in the same situation. Considering our own similarities to others in need will help to promote empathy and compassion.

• Write a letter to yourself. Think of a situation that caused you to feel pain (a breakup with a lover, a job loss, a poorly received presentation). Write a letter to yourself describing the situation, but without blaming anyone — including yourself. Use this exercise to nurture your feelings.

• Give yourself encouragement. Think of what you would say to a good friend if he or she was facing a difficult or stressful situation. Then, when you find yourself in this kind of situation, direct these compassionate responses toward yourself.

• Practice mindfulness. Even a quick exercise, such as meditating for a few minutes, can be a great way to nurture and accept ourselves while we're in pain.

There are countless proven benefits of compassion such as increased happiness, reduced stress, improved medical outcomes, and increased social connectedness. One study found that physicians significantly reduced anxiety among cancer patients by simply providing a 40-second compassion video to patients. Moreover, among patients who viewed this short video, doctors were rated as higher in caring, compassion, and warmth.

The biggest takeaway message is that compassion matters. Compassion is an essential element in society and is vital to the survival of the human race. It is as vital to life as the air we breathe.